:doors:change:life:gratitude:

I know everything you have done. And I have placed before you an open door that no one can close. You were not very strong, but you obeyed my message and did not deny that you are my follower~rev 3:8 (cev)

i dreamed a dream of new beginnings. the door is opening, i can feel it!

i am loved. i am well cared for. despite the title of said people. i am lucky.

i will be ok. i am ok. always will be ok, or maybe even better than ok.

and i am really starting to like being me. ive always liked it, but im starting to enjoy it.

this past season of my life is over. i claim it. i need it. it is done.

old mentalities are dying. ones i was never meant to carry, ones that don’t belong and do not fit. their roots are cut and they are withering away.

i like this kind of change.

promise. promising. transformed. changed. changing.

its a new love for life. new outlooks. layers of junk are falling away.
something pure is remainging. something fair.

……delete

wow its been a while. i’d say

lots to say, however tonight is not the night. (nor will this be that profound)

its just funny to me, how a random email can control a whole day. i’ve come full circle.
12pm i read an email that pretty much destroys me. enter in heaps of anger and hurt.
a friend calls about 30 minutes after
said friend chats with me for about 15 minutes. i calm down a bit.
10 minutes later i get a hug, same friend (thanks!! even though i know you wont read this)

3 hours later i go to work
feeling better. but not great.
lots of nice people on board, good crew. one angry man. fuck him too.

12 hours after the stupid email, i am in a cab on my way home. a friend got engaged today (congrats!)
yes, life goes on

cab drivers hears i want a smoke, gives me one.
now i am HOME! ooh how i missed you.

take off those bloody heels (thats why i dont wear them often!)
change into pj’s-life’s perspective is yet better

go have a smoke. hang out with God for a moment.
“what do i do about the email?”
“nothing”
get a picture of another hug… this time its my spirit… well, im guessing, cuz i sure didnt feel arms around me

go down to the computer. check facebook and emails. find the ‘trash’ bin
find email.
clear the trash, because thats all it is.

and as easy as it was for the email to come, its gone. just a fading memory.
and thats it.
now for some much needed sleep

but first?! some bacon… yum